Top tips to make Mothers Day easier for separated parents

Special dates in the year can be a tough time for separated parents, and with Mothers Day coming up, relationship experts Relate have compiled a list of tips for mums AND dads this Mothers Day.

A Relate counsellor said that Mothers Day, like Christmas, school holidays and other special dates, can be difficult if you are separated, with different members of the family wanting to see children at certain times and routines being disrupted.

So here are Relates top tips for making Mothers Day special this year:

·         Be honest. If you can, try to be honest with your ex partner about what you’d like to do on Mother’s Day. If you want to change arrangements so that you have the children when you wouldn’t usually, make sure you talk openly to your ex and give plenty of notice.

·         Remember it’s just one day. This is important, especially if you’ve recently separated. Your children are likely to feel a bit strange as to how to approach Mother’s Day, so try not to put too much pressure on it.

·         Plan something for yourself. Regardless of whether you have the kids or not, plan a little treat for yourself on or around Mother’s Day. Every mum deserves a reward for all your hard work – whether it’s a spa day with your own mum or just a cheeky bar of chocolate.

 

Not forgetting the dads, Relate have also put together a list of things Dads can do that will make the day easier.

·         Give a little. If you can, try to talk to your ex partner about what she’d like to do on Mother’s Day. Try to be flexible where you can on who has the children that day – a little gesture like swapping your days can go a long way.

·         Help the kids out. Even if your relationship with your ex is difficult, she will always be your kids’ mum, and it can really help children to know that you understand their relationship with both parents is important. Help them write cards or buy presents if possible.

·         Plan something for yourself. It can be tough to imagine the children having a special time with your ex, especially if the break up is recent. Instead of dwelling on that, have something in mind to look forward to yourself – maybe planning a treat for your own mum.

Do you struggle with special dates in the calendar? Do you have any of your own top tips to make things go smoothly? Would love to hear from you.