B&Q on red alert for Fifty Shades of Grey

If you have read Fifty Shades of Grey you will be familiar with the desire for rope, cable ties and tape...Well, at least DIY shopping will no longer be such a bore.

Or perhaps you are waiting for the film which is released Saturday 14th February? In which case let me just summarise for you. I promise I haven’t seen it either so no spoilers will feature.

Mr Grey makes a variety of purchases that may not seem so out of the ordinary in a hardware store, unless you have a creative imagination which with Fifty Shades of Grey I’m almost certain is a must. We have the knowledge of the book though, so we know Grey’s relationship with Anastasia Steele opens up a whole new world. That of dominant sexual role play and bondage – fairly steamy stuff.

However, apparently all of this isn’t just a fantasy anymore. For those of you feeling a little saucy, staff at B&Q have been alerted about this risqué scenario becoming reality.

It turns out a leaked message to workers at the DIY chain had been asked to prepare themselves for questions relating to this raunchy scene. (When I say chain, no I’m not yet talking about the kind of chain Christian Grey might use). The memo was titled, "Staff Briefing – Preparation for Fifty Shades of Grey Customer Queries." Pretty suggestive!

In essence B&Q want all stores and staff members to clue themselves up on what DIY apparatus would become appropriate (so to speak) in the bedroom. As you might be aware when the book was released in 2012, hardware stores in the UK really saw an escalation in demand for rope, cable ties and duct tape - all thanks to Grey and his sexual experiences in the Fifty Shades – so monitoring stock makes a lot of sense. After all it’s best to be prepared when a cheeky grin asks you where they can find rope.. because obviously customer satisfaction is at the heart of every consumer-based company.

Really, I think all of this is just a heads-up for all staff members. If you want it you better get your purchases sorted soon.